Keeping Myself Busy.

The more I do, the less I remember I hurt, and that after I stop hurting in this manner I'll hurt more.  AND I'll have a newborn.
Ignorance is bliss.  


Her name is Sarah.
His name is Mark.
They have three children.
They're a ton of fun.
But, they are not the McDaniels.

This was one of the shoots I had this past weekend:

Yes.  They are laughing at her falling down.
Nope, it isn't mean.  It was funny.

I have decided to buy a house in their neighborhood.
I will write it off as my "studio".
Because everything about my morning with them was
AMAZEBALLS.

Nope, not your imagination.
You suddenly smell Man.
You hear grunting.
And have the urge to eat mass amounts of chili. 

I'm so glad I'm not them.
I do not want the task of deciding the Christmas card photo...

The Madness Continues.

Guests started arriving.  In pajamas.  

For some reason, being giant causes my brain to stop working.  I did not think to take a picture of the actual Cereal bar.
We had:
Lucky Charms
Cheerios
Coco Puffs
Rice Krispies
Corn AND Frosted Flakes
Shredded Wheat 
Fruit Loops
Apple Jacks
Corn Pops 
Raisin Bran
Two types of Granola
For toppings we had:
Berries (Straw, Rasp, and Black)
Marshmallows
Oreos
M&M's
Chocolate Chips 
Graham Crackers
Chocolate Syrup


Plus yogurt or milk.  Depending on your tastes.  


Then, once the sugar was flowing there was time to burn it off.  In the bounce house.  Or in the playroom.
Or, wander around just munching on corn pops...

When the sugar buzzes started to fade, we had back up.

B-rox called his cake "Pirate Island".
I called it Timeout Island.
Those two definitely need to be in timeout...

Nov. 13, 2010.  Disney and Nasa Team up and Buzz Lightyear is the
first person to land on Mercury.  

The one concession I had to make, in order to throw a "together" party for the boys - was to make each of them their own cake.

It was a small concession.  I made it.  And somehow, the cakes turned out to be identifiable as what was requested...  That like, never happens.  

Where else would you put the candles?
And no, there aren't five.
Yes, He is turning five.
Candles scare him.
He asked for three.

So excited to eat Mercury.
By Mercury, we're talking the cake.
Not my planet sized belly.
No comments on that kthxbai.

Assistance from dad, because candles are scary.
He didn't want to get close enough to blow them out.
And, they, apparently were trick candles...
Woops.

Then it was time for presents.

Yes.  That is a light saber.
I was scared of the eye damage that would be caused.
So far - none.
Just less bad dreams.  Because now they have light sabers to fight
the bad guys with.

Post present hoopla was everybody's nap time.
So they went home, hopefully without diabetes, and slept it off.
Bonus - they were already in jammies!  


Seriously, thank you to everybody who came.  Who dealt with the pandemonium that was this party.
The boys are still buzzing from all the "awesomeness" your presence (and because they're 3 and 5, your presents, too) brought.
We are blessed to call you friends, and family.

The Madness. 2010. (Part Uno)

The boys celebrated their birthdays this weekend.  This is a recap, for those who couldn't join us.  

Because we want you to feel sad you missed it.  

Ok - ok.  I'm joking.  

Mother, why are you making us hold them up?
Please just let us unwrap them! 

 The first gifts were a part of the plan.  A set of new jammies to wear.  To their Pajama party.

Mario brothers and some monster jammies.

Started this party right!  

Face upon seeing the next gift...
No.  It was not a car.

It was a bounce house.
Or, as I like to call it - the "New mommy sanity saver". 

The next gifts were from Jammy.
(Ma, they were just as excited when they actually opened them.) 

"How did she know it would match my room so awesome?"
Magic, son.  Magic.

"Mom!  It has Mercuries! A lot of them.
And Aliens!"

And then the doorbell started ringing...
Stay tuned for part deux.  

Randomness to Help You With Your Boredom

Because, I'm sure, none of you have a life.

That was a joke.  Take a deep breath.  


Tomorrow is the boys' birthday party.  There is a bounce house in my garage, 10lbs of cereal and various fixings in my kitchen, two cakes in my fridge, and two very swollen ankles attached to my legs.
I'm blogging random stuff from my life, while hubband finishes sweeping.  


So here you go:

The vanity plates will never stop being entertaining.

Ah, fashionista in the making.
He later put on his sandals.

This is how we say good morning.

Does this really need a caption?

Lets shove a pillow into this seat, then totally... NOT use it. 

He is awesome.  And getting so big.
It's a little scary.

Three drive-thru lanes at the Chic-fil-A.
A cop  to direct traffic.
Mass pandemonium.

I've eaten there once.
NOT on a Saturday.

Amish hat.
Kills me everytime.

Bob,
Does this earn me my "temporary honorary membership" into the
Gingy Club???

Also note the awesome bags under my eyes.
That's after makeup.

This fetus isn't even born yet and I'm only
averaging 3.5 hours of sleep a night! 

I SO Didn't See That One Coming...

Conversation three minutes ago:

B-rox: Mom, why do pirates have so many gadgets?

Me: Because men like gadgets.  Gadgets make men happy.  That's why tool stores are so big and why they wear stuff on their belts.

B-rox: Oh, is that why we have penis' and girls have vaginas?  Because they like stuff hanging off of them?

Oh jesus...

Because My Brain Refuses To Function.

I cannot come up with a decent full length pictures included, post.

I'm losing it folks.  But that's ok.  I get my hair cut tomorrow.  I have been counting down the days since I made the appointment 23 days ago.

*I'm pretty bummed that I couldn't keep running the whole way through this. I'm still working out, the boys and I head to the pool in the evenings, I swim laps and Mark gives the trolls swim lessons.  I just miss running...
I feel blessed to live in a neighborhood with an indoor pool.  Swimming year 'round is awesome.  The strides the boys have made since the beginning of the summer have been astronomical.
Braxton barely needs us (it's more we're there because... well, to not be is irresponsible) with his floaty on.  Then, for the last 15 minutes or so after I've finished my workout - he takes his floaty off and works on actual swimming.  You should have seen him with the kickboard yesterday - amazeballs.  The best part for me is seeing how proud Hubband is.  The despair he felt over the fact that none of his children seemed to really enjoy swimming was pretty palpable.  Now they do, and he's all "Look at meh, I'm raising a hoard of Mike Phelps'!!! My swimmers make awesome swimmers!"  


*B-rox has finally caught on to the awesomeness of mothers.
After repeatedly telling him to sit down and eat his dinner, he got up again.  This is what happened:


Me: BRAXTON - SIT YOUR BOOTY DOWN NOW!  (The bellow was awesome, really.)
B: Mom - you weren't even looking at me - how did you know I was sneaking out?  How do you always know this stuff????????
Me:  I'm your mom.  It means I have superpowers.  I will always know when you're sneaking.
B: That makes me SO mad.  It's not fair!!!!!!
I know son, I know...


*I, am apparently, ok with lying to my kids.
The other night we had spaghetti and meatballs for dinner.
Braxton, who happens to fear meat, asked for one meatball cut into "many" pieces.
I have him five, cut in half.
He thanked me for the delicious meatball.
I smiled and said "you're welcome".

*Das Boysikins super awesome special birthday party is this weekend.
Pray for me. 

*There are 19 days until I'm full term.  26 days to the point that each of my other two pregnancies ended. 40 days until the due date.
I'm pretty sure that's not enough time for me to be ready.  (physically - yes.  Mentally.... probably never.)
What should scare everyone about these particular numbers is that means there are only 45 days until Christmas.  Are You ready? 


*On a quick and positive note, the weather here has been wonderful.  The leaves make me happy every time I look at them.  Seriously.  It's like shoot rainbows out of your booty, happy gorgeousness! 


Signing off,
Galactic President Superstar McAwesomeville

Testing, Testing...

As you saw in the Halloween post, Hubband owns an old car.  A 1979 Chevy Corvette, to be exact.


As is the case quite often, he had to go to work today.  His AWS day.  (He works his 80 hours in 9 days, as opposed to 10 - to earn that every other Friday off.  Fabulous.  When it works.) 
However, the rest of his carpool - did not.

So, he got to drive his car to the train station.  Being old, it takes a moment to get humming.
By humming, I mean it growls.  And yes, I find it kind of sexy.  But that's another matter.  
He started his car, then did his very manly household chore of taking the recycling out to the curb for pick up.

After changing the oil in his car, he just pulled it forward, and parked backwards in the driveway.  So, when he was doing his manly recycling duty (I also find recycling sexy.  Also, another matter...)  his car was blowing the exhaust into the garage.  Which has a door, leading to the house.  Which hubband left open.
The security system on our house goes "Beep Beep Beep - Back Door" whenever the contacts are separated. 
Very wise of him, less chitlin' disturbage/wife disturbage.

Until about 30 minutes after he left.  I began hearing "Riing Beeep Riing - Carbon Monoxide detected".  


Shit. 


Luckily, my pregnant nose could smell the exhaust fumes before I even got to the main floor.

A real gas leak would have been a shitty way to begin my Friday.  


I "calmed" the kids down.  (More on this in a minute...)

Put on pants.  No, I do not sleep with pants on.  They tend to create tourniquets on my legs by the end of the night.  


Then I opened every window in the house, in 38 degree weather, at 6:00 in the morning.

We went to McDonalds.  Where, I managed to look not very pretty... 


Then, the Fryer alarms went off, and Braxton started bawling again.
"Mom, I'm tired of emergencies.  Can we just go home and watch a movie?"
"Unfortunately, no.  We have to let the house air out. Eat your pancakes."
"Hahaha, vaginas."
[facepalm] {mental cursing to whomever told him that was funny.  I will rue you for forever!!}


Then we came home.  To a refrigerator where our house used to be.

Put on slippers, and watched "How to Train Your Dragon".

We've yet to fall into a sleepy coma.

Lesson of the day?
Beware of the consequences of telling your hubband he needs a hobby...