Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Frustrated, Confused and Looking to Start New.

This is going to be a long post.  Most of which is me whining.  Then talking about stuff you probably don't care about.  And not a single picture.

This past month has been hell.  H - E - Double Hockey Sticks - HELL!

The boys came down with some sort of cold/virus.  I call them "Snot-inators".  Yes, we watch way too much Phineas and Ferb. 

Anyway, I came down with it about a day later.  Then Hubband caught it too.  You would think having a tissue permanently attached to your face was back in ala Michael Jackson style the way my family has been sporting them the past month.  

Eventually, all three boys started clearing up.  Noses stopped dripping, they could sleep laying down again and the inhalers went back to every 12 hour usage, instead of every four.

Notice how I said boys?

I did not clear up.  In fact, I've been sick for the last three weeks straight.  Visiting the zoo two weekends ago nearly killed me.  Ok, maybe not killed.  But I could barely move, and breathing just wasn't on the menu.  

I'm a pretty lucky gal and my husband is usually pretty willing to step in and pick up where I leave off.  Which, this month has meant - everything.  Honestly, being sick plus nursing plus being chauffeur to the B-rox is over my threshold of "I can deal with this shiz".  He's awesome.  No lie.

So, on top of trying to kick the "Snot-inator's" azz - this weekend I woke up with a raging sore throat.  RAGING.  But, busted through the weekend of lunch with a friend and a short trip to the mall with another.
A quick peek in the mirror confirmed some not so happy suspicions.  I have strep.  If you don't know what tonsils infected with strep look like - Google it.  Avoiding the doctor becomes harder when you see that in your throat.
[side -note:  I'm 100% breastfeeding.  I'm trying my hardest to avoid drugs, because while I'm not against them (usually pretty pro-drugs.  Especially of the pain killer variety), I know that my 2 month old doesn't need anti-biotics flowing through his system if he's not sick.  Which, he hasn't really been. So - I've been trying to kick things the "homey" way.  ie. homeopathically.  It's not working.] 

Anyway, B-rox also has strep.  Strep and I have a long history and the sound of a voice fighting around swollen tonsils is one I've heard out of my own throat many times.  Quick peek with a mag-light and my suspicions for him were confirmed as well.  Strep, case dos for the McDaniel family.
We're headed to the doctor in a few hours for a culture, and antibiotics.  

I've also been pretty depressed this month.  The weather, uncertainty of where the Navy/NR is taking us next,  no regular workout schedule, 12am to 2am hell, and the sickness and exhaustion that has kept us holed up in the house.
I also start to get pretty panicky and stressed when I think about having to leave the house with the baby.  Which is weird.  Because this isn't my first merry-go-round.  This is also adding to my "down" feeling.  I love getting out of the house and doing things.  Going shopping, taking the kids to the park, etc.
But when I start thinking about leaving the sanctuary of my rocking chair, I sweat and sometimes feel like crying.  On the plus side, Hubband is pretty happy with the lack of spending on my part!
[other sidenote:  Our trips into the district only made it worse.  Traffic is not good for a baby who can't handle the car.  A total of 4 hours of listening to him scream.  At the end of each leg I felt like bawling myself and peeing.  But that's because of the venti black-iced tea lemonade...]

So, this month has been hell.  Sickness.  Post-partum depression? (I don't know the answer to that.  It's probably mostly just exhaustion.  I'm tired.  Very.  But should stop complaining, because Baby H is pretty good as far as newborns go.)  Mostly yucky-weather.  I'm not a happy person right now.

So, I'm looking for a new start.

Lent starts next week.  A plan that has been brewing in the back of my mind for a couple of months was brought to the front by Hayley's and Mrs. Wookie's pact to go vegan for a week.

My family, for the most part, eats pretty well.  Mostly lean meats, and tons of produce. (Produce is 2/3 of our grocery bill every month...)  I've slowly over the last several months been weaning them all off of processed foods.  This month has been a bad one, as I haven't been at the wheel (aka: Stove) and have been craving disgusting things like KFC.  (Which is sooo bad but sooo good.)

So, I'm thinking this Lent is a good time to start a new chapter in our family's menu planning, and, hopefully health.

My plan (which, is also going to be my sacrifice.  A sacrifice that I hope will become just normal.) is as follows:
To start, I'd like us all to eat 2 days a week completely meat free.  On the third day, I'd like us to eat "food with a mother" free.  Aka: Vegan.  (During Lent, this day will be Fridays.)
I don't intend to completely cut out meat or dairy ever.  I think we'd just be better suited with less of it.
I also don't intend to cut out "naughty" foods for forever.  But I'd like them to go back to being more of a "treat" than a regular thing.
I read the Chinese study a few months ago on plant-based diets - and the results were overwhelmingly good.
I also recently discovered the "Engine 22" book.  (Firefighters were put on a plant based diet.) Also, all good things.

And, I've already been referred to as a "baby-wearing, granola eating, breast-feeding, cloth-diapering, recycle-it-or-die, hippie".  So why not add "Sometimes vegetarian/vegan" in there?

I am praying it leads to better health for all of us, more energy and better mindset for me, and better health for all of us.  (Wait, did I already say that?)   I also wouldn't mind it if it helped me shed the baby weight and I'm sure Hubband (he's not going to be happy with this statement) wouldn't mind it if it helped him lose the baby/winter weight as well.

So, with this plan in mind, "Highlights" hidden pictures and Netflix apps on the phone and iPod, I'm off to the doctors.
Wish us luck.

3 reviews:

Karen said...

I hope you feel better and March is a much better month for you. My throat hurts just reading this.

Ashley, the Accidental Olympian said...

Internet hugs. Like lots of them.

Seriously, a 2 month old and a month of sickness? Anyone would be ready to throw in the towel. You're a trooper.

Lindsay said...

Yea. I kinda want to cry for you now too. Been there. Done that. And it's more than hell. There's not even a word for it.
You probably have post-partum. Sounds an awful lot like what I was feeling. It's a little more than exhaustion. And I was always too embarrassed to tell anyone or do anything about it. But I've heard there's a nifty little shot you can get to help balance the hormones. You might want to ask your doc about it if you don't want to bury your head in a hole and curl up in the fetal position even thinking about talking to him about it.
Or. Feel free to call me anytime. Because I understand. 100%. The good news--it goes away. The bad news--sucks bad while you're in it.
Hang in there. And get something for the strep and get healthy. That should help a ton.
And good luck with the vegan thing. I could never do it.