Thursday, April 28, 2011

Medical Licenses For Free... Apparently.

I breast feed.  
Because I can.
Because it's what's best for me.
It's what's best for my baby.
I really like "having a treadmill strapped to my chest".  Because, let's face it.  Women are not happy with the way they look after having a kid. I am, obviously, a woman, thus not happy with my body post-baby. 
I also like that it's, uh, free.  (Except for the fact that I'm Hungry Like The Wolf.  All. The. Time.)
That being said - If you don't breast feed.  That's fine.  It's none of my business why, I don't judge, if your baby is happy - if you are happy - I don't understand why I should have an opinion on how you feed your baby.  

I also cloth diaper. 
I think everybody should do this (but understand if you don't).  If you ask me about it, I'm likely to evangelicalize about it.  Just call me Sister Sarah, of the Church of Cloth Diapers.  

Alright, now that we've gotten the introduction over with - I can go into my rant. 

Holdeezy went in to his 4 month well baby appointment on Monday.  After a quick "systems check" as I call them, (reflexes - body part check - heart/lung -eyes, ears, nose, mouth), this is the conversation that followed:

Doctor: I checked his weight on the growth chart, he seems to be on the low end of the scale.
Me: That's not really surprising.  Neither of my other children were huge and my first is what you'd call tiny.
Dr: Are you nursing full time?
Me: Yes.  
Dr:  It may be time to switch to formula.
Me: Uh, why?
Dr: Because your baby is small.
Me: Uhm, he's gained a pound in the last month...
Dr: Yes, but he's only in the 20th percentile for weight.
Me: Yes, but he continues to gain - on the 20th percentile curve.  I'm not seeing the problem.
Dr: Well, how do you know he's getting enough food?
Me: I nurse on demand, and whenever I pump I can hit 8 ounces in about 5 minutes.  So, I know I'm making enough.
Dr: You should think about supplementing with formula.
Me: I don't understand why.
Dr: Your baby is small.
Me: My baby is small - in weight.  (In height he's in the 70th percentile - or something like that.) But he has fat rolls on his legs, is happy (hello - hungry babies aren't) and is gaining weight just fine.  He's a small dude.  JUST. LIKE. HIS. BROTHER! 
Dr: Also, there was a tiny bit of butt rash - cloth diapering doesn't seem to be working.  You should save yourself the energy and just switch to disposables. 
Me: My kid has been sick, and running a fever.  The fact that his diaper rash is barely noticeable is BECAUSE of the cloth diapers.  
Dr: So, you're going to continue to breast feed? 
Me: Yes.  
Dr: You should start giving him rice cereal.
Me: 2 problems with that: I don't plan on starting solids until 6months and if you're worried about calories - recommending  rice cereal is probably not wise as it's LOWER in calories. 
Dr: Ok.  But you should come back in two weeks for a weight check.
Me: WHY? HE GAINED A POUND IN A MONTH!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! 

So, I'm pretty convinced he obtained his medical license for free.  On the internet.  From "We are Idiots Academy".  
Also, why are there so many nutters in the medical/dental profession - and why do I have to see them all?

8 reviews:

Mrs. Wookie said...

Oooo, I don't know I would have been that nice! While I don't have stats off the top of my head on boob-juicing (although a fan if you can), I'd throw the tree-hugging Mrs. Wookie on his ass. "Do you know they bleach disposable diapers? Do you know what bleach does to a baby's skin? Do you know the landfill issue resulting from disposable diapers? Do you know the costs associated with disposables?" I'll stop now. :)

Now I kinda wanna piggy-back you to your appointments. I'll wear my Birks, my 'I heart clam' shirt, and Oregonian pride.

When's his next checkup...I'll check airfare! :D

Mommy McD said...

Babies have well checks at 6mos, 9mos, 12 mos, 18mos, 2 years and yearly after that.
He was also fat, and the hairiest man I've ever seen in my life. He had hair on his fingers all the way to his fingernails.

EMM said...

Time for a new pediatrician!! I would've been SO upset with him after that conversation. Good for you for sticking to your guns, but I wouldn't be able to handle another appointment with that dude again. You just keep doing what you're doing- baby is doing great!!

Rochelle said...

I am terrified of ending up with a doc like that. If it happens, I will probably tell them where they can shove their obviously uneducated opinions.

I'm so sorry you're having to deal with it - that crap pisses me off to no end.

breedwoman said...

UH that makes me so mad! I breastfed and the MOST my daughter EVER ate at a feeding was 4oz. I think i just had like straight cheese for milk or something... anyway my pedi NEVER cared or said anything (even though she was low % like your baby) because LIKE your baby she was happy, gaining weight, AND had chunky legs. Some people are SO stupid.
We cloth diaper part of the time because daycare won't, but whenever she has a bad rash, i switch hardcore at home to cloth, TOTALLY helps.
Eff drs sometimes. My child gets a fever and a runny nose with EVERY tooth she cuts, yet they say they aren't related... OKAY!

Lindsay said...

No seriously. How do you get the biggest Jack-assess seeing your kids? First the dentist (who by the way is king of jack-assery) and now the pediatrician. What pediatrician tells a mom NOT to breastfeed? Unbelievable. There's nothing better for a baby than boob juice. And if he's not screamin' he's not hungry. Find a GIRL pediatrician. Seriously. They are way, way, WAY better.
And I would love to chat with you about cloth diapers. It sounds atrocious to me, but maybe you can sway me....plead your case.

Lindsay said...

Actually, I think you should do a post on cloth diapers. I'm dead serious. How they work (no, I don't really know)? How they don't leak when the kid pees? Do they have blow outs?
What are the advantages?
What are the dis-advantages?

Do tell.
Save the earth one blog post at a time.

Mommy McD said...

Alright. I'll put a post together on CDing.